Chasing a Dream

My temporary digs in Toronto                                                                                                             (Photo by Danny)

During the Spring of 2017, I separated from a forty year marriage and began planning a new life for Holly Golightly and me.  And as much as it pains me to write about such a private matter, I wanted to be very clear about one thing – it was not because of infidelity or anything nasty or sinister.  It’s been something I’d been wrestling with for several years and I was very unhappy, which resulted in an unhappy relationship for both of us.  I am not coming out of any closet – and I am totally straight – I just want for both of us to have happiness in our lives.

I decided to wait until my wife retired in December before leaving and we continue to share the same house, although we’ve had separate bedrooms and haven’t been intimate for many years.  We decided to list our house in the New Year and expect to have it on the market within the next few days.  We will be dividing everything equally, but I won’t be purchasing another home.  I wish her well, and that’s all I have to say on this matter.


In December, during one of my walks with the Surrey Trekkers and Vancouver Venturers Volkssport Clubs, I was chatting with my friend Frank S. about my future plans regarding housing options in Vancouver and he came up with a few recommendations that were very interesting.   But first, I had to resolve a pressing question, namely: ‘Where do I want to live?’  I had already decided to rent instead of buying but knew that it would be a challenge to find a place that allows dogs.  And I wasn’t sure if I wanted to remain in Vancouver – despite the fact that it is the best place on Earth – it is also very expensive.  So I started thinking about Vancouver Island and/or the Sunshine Coast.  But there was this silent voice from within, that urged me to consider my birthplace in Southern, Ontario.   That same voice reminded me of the secret dream I’ve had for many years, but shared with no one.  And now, I could begin chasing my dream!

But first, I had an appointment for a CT Scan on my lungs on January 12th.  A year and a half ago, they found two small spots on my right lung, and my oncologist wanted to compare the size of the spots after six months.  In February 2017, the CT Scan showed that the two spots were still in the upper chamber but now there were two additional spots on the lower chamber of the right lung!  Dr. K. scheduled my next CT Scan for September but by August, I was going through a lot of stress because of the separation and Holly’s illness and subsequent surgery.  I decided not to go for the scan or the follow-up appointment.  And I’m embarrassed to admit that I didn’t even call to cancel those appointments.

I stopped my daily walks and continued to slide into a deeper depression, aka feeling sorry for myself.  I had stopped communicating with my brothers and sisters for more than a year but fortunately, I still had my family at the Fraser Valley Cancer Centre in Surrey, whom I love dearly; and my best friends’ Norm and Robert – who I consider the older brothers I never had but always wanted.  But as close as these people are to me – I haven’t shared my dream with anyone – it’s always been a secret.

They say there are three types of secrets that we all possess, namely:

  1. Secrets we share with family
  2. Secrets we share with best friends
  3. Secrets we keep hidden deep within 

But all of that changed in early October when I learned about the Surrey Trekkers Volkssport Club.  And just as the BC Cancer Agency had saved my life eight years ago – this walking/hiking club dragged me out of the darkness and into a world of smiles and friendship!  We walk three times a week at various locations in the Lower Mainland and Washington State.  I also joined the Vancouver Venturers Volkssport Club and I’m a member of the Washington Trail Association.  Walking with these clubs has been an effective treatment because amazingly, I lost the depression during my first walk with the Surrey Trekkers.  It has been the best thing that I have done for myself – in a very long time and I’ll be writing a lot more about it in the future!  


Chasing a Dream

The snowbirds had already begun the migration to a warmer climate in early December, and several other flocks would be leaving in January, after spending the Holiday Season at home with friends and family.  But I, on the other hand, decided to travel to a colder place – Toronto, Ontario.  You should have seen the look on the faces of my fellow walkers when they learned about my plans to visit the land of ice, snow and frigid temperatures (and people).

‘Danny, why are you going to Toronto?’ they’d ask politely while trying not to roll their eyes in shock and disbelief.

Someone once said, “It’s better to keep your mouth shut and be thought of as a fool – than to open it and remove all doubt!”  But I’m not sure the warning applies to the written word.  But in any event, here are the reasons why I’m visiting Ontario for three weeks in January.  I want to find answers to the following questions, namely:

  • Would I be able to live in Ontario, after leaving thirty-six years ago?  

A lot has changed over the years.  I’ve always liked Ontario but I like the West Coast best, followed by the East Coast.

  • Could I live in ‘downtown’ Toronto? 

I last lived in Toronto in 1974.  It was in a high-rise apartment in Etobicoke at the end of the subway line.   But I want to stay in the heart of downtown Toronto, preferably in the harbor area with an unobstructed view of Lake Ontario.

  • Would Holly and I be happy living in a high rise condo or apartment rental?

Holly is twelve years old and needs to be able to go outside when Nature calls.  But I’ve seen lots of people in Robert’s old apartment building with dogs, so it’s a possibility.  But my preference would be something on the ground level with a bit of an enclosed patio or balcony, so it will be easier for both the dog and me.  The experience will be valuable regardless of what city I choose to live.

  • Could I give up my vehicle and rely on transit? 

I’m getting older and finding it more difficult and stressful, driving in rush hours and/or in heavy traffic and driving in the dark.  I also have less patience with ignorant drivers, who seemed to become more plentiful in recent times.  I’d rather just rent a car for the day when I need it and walk or take transit as my normal mode of travel.  You also see more when you’re a passenger. 

  • Could I endure the cold, cold winters?

I’ve already answered that question.  NO!  But I’m hoping to go south during the winters, so this isn’t a factor.  


But Danny, how are you going to afford a hotel in downtown Toronto for three weeks?

Relax, Spanky – I’ve done some online research – comparing the cost of hotels vs AirNB.  And in so doing, it didn’t take long to realize that I could rent a condo for about half of what it would cost to rent a hotel room, as well as other advantages, including: 

  • Avoid the cost of staying in a hotel with no refrigerator or stove to make my special meals
  • I also compared AirNB vs Craigslist
    • AirNB gave much more info and pictures and better variety of choices and only featured listings that were available Jan 13-31st
    • No idea if Craigslist listings were accurate vs AirNB – so I went with the better known of the two choices
    • I’d be living with condo residents vs hotel guests – because they’d be friendlier if they thought I was a new neighbor
    • Having a washer and dryer was an added bonus to avoid dry cleaning bills – pack fewer clothes

I found a condo in a high-rise on York Street and Queens Quay – with an unobstructed view of the lake and just a few blocks from Union Station, Air Canada Centre and of course, the iconic CN Tower.  The cost per night was $113.   But the fee was non-refundable after I took possession, so I hoped the pictures and info were accurate.  I booked the condo from January 13 – 3oth and paid in advance.  I also planned to stay in a hotel at the Toronto Airport on January 3oth to avoid the next day rush to get to the airport.

I also booked my flight and chose Premium Seating vs Economy.  I used to travel Business Class when I was working – but that was when I had Super Elite and Elite status with Aeroplan and had lots of upgrade certificates.

Friday, January 12, 2018 

I went to Surrey Memorial Hospital at 8:00 AM for my CT Scan.  They inject a dye intravenously into you and then you feel a sudden, warm rush throughout your body.  The dye reacts to any cancer cells that are present and makes cancer visible.  The scan doesn’t take too long – and I’ve had many of them over the past eight years.  I asked Dr. Karvat’s secretary to book the follow-up appointment for February 2, 2018, so I could do the trip to Ontario.  All I could think about during the scan was my trip to Ontario the next day and finally, chasing a dream – my dream!

Now that you’ve got a little background but before we start this journey together – you might want to fasten your seatbelt, stand behind the sneeze guard and hang on tightly because I have no idea how or when this story is going to end!


Saturday, January 13, 2018

The Air Canada Maple Leaf Lounge was the perfect place to wait for my plane to begin boarding and I was thankful that I had upgraded to business class.  During the last fifteen years of my career with General Motors of Canada Limited, I was a frequent flyer and obtained Aeroplan Elite or Super Elite status every year – which meant lots of free upgrade certificates – priority boarding and unlimited access to the Maple Leaf Lounge.  So even when I had the lowest fare – I still had all of those benefits. 

The lounge has a self-serve bar & beverage service, food, and snacks; workstations, desks, magazines, newspapers, and television to watch while waiting for your plane to board.  Although retired for thirteen years, and I no longer have access to free upgrades – there is the option when traveling by Air Canada to purchase access to the Maple Leaf Lounge for $50 – even if you’re flying in Economy Class.  It’s a great option, to consider when traveling economy class.

We boarded the 787 plane, and I had a private domain – complete with a seat that became a bed, TV monitor and desk; headphones, remote control – and the unit is both a window and aisle location; with nobody sitting on either side of me. 

The flight attendant soon arrived with a glass of orange juice and a breakfast menu.  I explained that I’m not able to eat solid food but if they had a yogurt or ice cream – I’d be happy with either.  She also offered me a newspaper from Australia – which is where the plane had originated from earlier. 

Soon we were 39,000 feet in the air, and I had my headphones on and listening to one of my Eagles tunes, and they began serving breakfast.  I could tell by the heavenly fragrance – they were serving pancakes and sausages.  The flight attendant brought me a yogurt with the saddest expression on her young face.

‘Are you sure that I can’t bring you something else?’ she whispered.

I thought about asking for a cocktail, but I seldom drink alcohol anymore because it burns my throat.  Back in the day, I would have ordered a double vodka on ice, with a dash of 7Up for color.  

‘No, but can I ask you a question?’ I whispered, ‘do you know Captain Joe G.?’

Immediately, her eyes lit up, and she was smiling from ear to ear.  We talked about our mutual friend and how Joe and his wife, Brenda, were my neighbors when I lived in Bedford, Nova Scotia (1989-’92).  Joe has been an Air Canada pilot for many years; we used to run into each other when he flew Dash 8’s with Air Nova in the 80’s.  It’s why I usually fly Air Canada – to support a buddy’s employment – and he always drove a GM product.  Brenda’s father was the regional manager of GMAC, which was also a connection.

I tried to configure the seat into a bed but couldn’t sleep a wink – I was too excited.  I decided to listen to one of the playlists of music on my laptop.  Next, to breathing, music is a ‘must have,’ and I have a library of over 10,000 songs – all of which I purchased.  I have never downloaded music or movies for free – artists deserve to get paid for their work and pirating is unconscionable.  Would you work if your employer decided not to pay you?   Me thinks, not!

The pilot’s voice suddenly shattered a hot daydream I was having.  He announced that we were about to land and the temperature was minus 35 degrees Celsius, with the windchill factor!  A large gasp of shock and disappointment erupted from the passengers.  ‘Where did they think we were landing – Hawaii?’, I thought.

Soon we were at the gate, and I was first off of the plane and racing to the luggage carousel to retrieve my suitcases.  After getting my bags, I went outside to get a limo and just about froze! 

On the drive downtown, I called Ramy G., the owner of the condo apartment, to confirm the address on York Street.  He told me to ring his buzzer when I got to the lobby of the building, and he would buzz me in.  He said that the apartment was open and the keys were on the kitchen counter.

The condo complex was actually two large high rises connected by a large lobby on the main floor.  It appeared to be a fairly new facility and it had two security people on the lobby desk, so I felt safe and secure.  ‘So far, so good!’ I thought.

I rang the buzzer to Ramy’s suite.  He buzzed me into the building and I headed to the elevator.  The apartment was on the 35th floor.  I had no sooner opened the door to the apartment when I heard the sirens from the street below.  I quickly dropped my suitcases on the floor and ran to the balcony door to see if the fire trucks were stopping at this complex. 

And that’s when I got the next shock! 

There was a sliding door to the balcony but the balcony itself was only 18 inches wide!  Not a lot of space to do anything but stand – and it was definitely too cold to do that! 

And although the sirens weren’t for this building, it made me wonder how I would ever be saved in the event of a fire; there isn’t a ladder tall enough in Toronto, that could even reach the 35th floor and there aren’t enough sheets in the condo to tie together to climb down thirty-five floors, either!

I looked around the condo and although it was very small – it appeared to have everything I’d need for my three-week stay.  I was dead tired but wanted to catch the evening news on the television and that’s when I got the next surprise – the tv didn’t get regular network or cable stations!  There was only a menu to view Netflix and other video/game options.  I tried various options but couldn’t find an option to view regular channels, so I called Ramy and asked how to get the television working.  He explained that it wasn’t a regular television but he would come to the condo in the morning to explain how to use it.  I was too tired to argue, so I started to unpack.  But there wasn’t even a dresser for my clothes – just one small end table with two drawers, beside the bed.  

‘Caveat emptor,’ I thought to myself and decided to unpack in the morning, instead.

But the bed was comfortable and within seconds, I was counting sheep.

Sunday, January 14, 2018

I awoke very early in the morning – despite the three hour difference in time zones.   The first day of a vacation is like the last day of school in June or the last day of work before retiring – and the Little Danny inside of me was excited at the thought of watching his first sunrise from the 35th floor of a lakefront condo in downtown Toronto!

I finished unpacking, made myself a protein smoothie and then took a shower and it was still dark!  But after pouring my third cup of coffee, I noticed the first rays of sunlight break-dancing on the eastern horizon.  I grabbed my cell phone and took a few pictures but forgot to open the screen door, so the photo isn’t going to win any awards but it will at least give you a sense of the location of the condo and the waterfront.

Morning sunrise from condo

I tried to figure out the television again but despite my best efforts – I couldn’t even get the menu to appear on the screen – just an error message.  It was too early to call Ramy, so I decided to start writing updates of my trip and posting them on my Facebook and Twitter pages.  I also started to send out emails and text messages to my friends in Southern Ontario – with invitations to get together during my stay.  I even had a place to entertain guests!  But there was one thing missing in the condo – and that was my Holly Golightly!  I have never been away from her for three weeks and I know how much we’ll miss each other but I also knew that I had to put thoughts of her away or I’d be torturing myself with guilt and despair.

I decided to book a car rental online and went to the Costco website because their rates were the most competitive and I was able to get a great deal with Enterprise, which had a location across from Union Station – which was within a few blocks of the condo.  I arranged to get the car at Noon and spent the rest of the morning trying to get the television working.  At about mid-morning, I called Ramy and asked him about the television again.  I also told him that the condo didn’t appear to be very clean, which he was surprised to hear.  He said that he was out-of-town and wouldn’t be back in Toronto until the next day but that he would send someone up to the condo in ten minutes, to resolve any issues I had.  He also said that the person would also give me a remote control to open the underground parking.  

I waited until late morning but nobody appeared so I decided to walk over to the Enterprise office to pick up my car rental.  As I was going down the elevator, every time it stopped and people entered the elevator, I would nod and/or say hello.  But everyone avoided eye contact and ignored my greeting, except one person with a large dog – the dog growled at me!  It’s not often that I’ve had a dog growl at me – I normally get along with all dogs.  But the dog only learns what it’s master teaches and I was about to dismiss the incident when suddenly I heard the dog owner’s friendly voice.

‘He’s a rescue dog – from Texas, and we’re his temporary foster home,’ the man spoke quietly.  

He was a tall, bearded man – about middle-aged and he was well-dressed.  It was Sunday – I wondered where he was going with his dog but didn’t ask.  Instead, I told him how wonderful it was to meet another dog owner and flashed a picture of Holly from my cell phone.  I was tempted to make up a story about saving Holly from some disaster but the truth was actually the opposite – she was with me 24/7 during my cancer treatments and recovery period, several years ago, and she’s never left my side since.  We said our goodbyes and I watched the pair walk down the hall ahead of me.  Every few steps, the dog would turn to see if I was coming with them.  It made me both sad and envious.

I walked out the lobby door of the building and into the freezing cold.  I had dressed warmly but nothing could prepare me for the frigid temperatures.  I walked up York Street to Front Street and then walked passed Union Station until I got to the Bay Street shopping mall.  I was surprised at how quiet the mall was but remembered that it was Sunday – maybe everyone’s at church, I thought.  But when I arrived at the Enterprise storefront office,  a sign on the door advised customers to go to the depot, located in the basement to meet the agent on duty.  Within several minutes I was standing at the Enterprise Kiosk.

‘Good afternoon, I have a reservation,’ I announced, somewhat proudly.

‘Sorry, we’re all booked!’ the agent replied.

‘But I have a reservation,’ I protested.  I just booked it online a couple of hours ago on Costco.  How could you possibly be completely booked?  What about the car that was reserved for me?  Did you rent it to someone else?’ 

I was starting to get upset. 

‘I just about froze my kahunas walking here in the freezing cold, and you’re telling me you’re sorry?  Well, I’m going to call Costco and complain about Enterprise double-booking rentals.

‘Sir, Enterprise didn’t double book – your issue is with Costco.  If they had checked our inventory – they would’ve found that we had no vehicles available.  And that’s not our problem – it’s theirs!’

I stormed out of his office, swearing under my breath and began the walk back to the condo.  But I was so hot from being angry that I hardly noticed the sub-zero temperatures.  When I got back to the condo lobby, one of the security guards mentioned that the temperature was minus 35 degrees Celcius, with the windchill factor!  By the way, am I the only guy who used to call it the ‘windshield factor’?  

When I got back inside the condo, I called Costco Travel and spoke to an agent about the fact that I had just frozen my kahunas in the freezing cold because Costco had screwed up on reserving me a vehicle.  The agent I spoke to had little sympathy and offered to find me another vehicle. 

‘No, I called to complain.  I want to speak to your supervisor so I can lodge a formal customer complaint – so that this isn’t repeated again.’  But he put me on hold and I waited and waited.  I was getting too upset and decided to just hang up and reserve a vehicle on my own.  But it was now mid-afternoon, so I decided to schedule the pickup for the next day – but this time with Budget.  

I spent the rest of the day on my laptop sending and receiving messages.  Later, I took a stroll to the Sobeys store to buy some supplies including fresh soup, yogurt, Pellegrino, ice cream and Ensure.  This is what I’ve been living on every day, since 2009.  I noticed two pubs in the same mall and thought about going inside to watch the news but both places had sports programs playing for their patrons – so I wouldn’t be able to watch the news or weather, for yet another day.  I’m starting to go through ‘withdrawal’ without being able to watch my favorite television programs (especially MSNBC, SPORTSNET  & HBO).  If I can last three weeks without watching network television – maybe that would be worth it.  I spend far too much time watching television and following US Politics – so, it’s probably just as well.

Monday, January 15, 2018

After my usual morning routine, I turned on the laptop and began reading my emails and updating my social media pages.  I called Ramy and told him that I would be picking up a vehicle and needed the remote control for the parking garage.  I also explained that despite his promise that someone would come to show me how to use the television – nobody had come!  He assured me that he would make everything right but that he was in his car and outside the city but expected to be back at the condo in about an hour.  He would bring me the remote at that time.  I thanked him and said goodbye.

About thirty minutes later, I heard a sudden knock on my condo door.  I couldn’t be sure if it was at my door or the neighbors but whoever was knocking – he/she seemed angry.  And then, a few seconds later, the knocking started again!  And now it sounded like it was coming from the neighbors.  Or had it? 

I began wondering things like:

  • maybe it’s the paperboy collecting?  Or
  • maybe it’s a police raid and they’re about to bust down the door? Or
  • maybe it’s a jealous husband or wife?  Or
  • maybe I’m just hearing things…

Suddenly, the knocking became louder and more aggressive. 

I quietly tiptoed to the door and peeked through the peephole and noticed a short, elderly man standing outside my door.  He had a remote control device in his hand.  He didn’t appear to be the same person as the one pictured on the AirNB ad but I wasn’t sure.  I opened the door.

‘Ramy?’, I asked.

‘No, Ramy’s dead!’, the man explained.

WTF!  I couldn’t believe my ears – I had just spoken to him thirty minutes ago – and now he’s dead?!  I felt an instant pang of guilt and genuine sorrow learning of his tragic death. 

‘Oh my God! (OMG!)’ I was struggling to find words as the short man walked passed me and into the living room.

‘Nice view!  You like view? Yes?’ 

He was smiling, which I found a bit odd.  But before I could say anything, the man picked up the tv remote and started playing with the buttons until he was able to get the menu.  He became very excited and proudly proclaimed that he’d fixed my television.

‘No, sir.  You don’t understand; I know how to turn on the television – but I want to watch the news and weather…’

‘See?  You got Netflix and everything!’

‘Listen, buddy, I don’t want to watch Netflix – that’s why I have a computer.  I want to watch regular programs like Rachel Maddow on MSNBC or Bill Maher on HBO, not to mention the NFL playoffs!’

The man suddenly realized the gravity of the situation and stopped speaking.  He stared at me for the longest moment and then suddenly his smile returned and he walked over to the balcony door.

‘You like view?  Very pretty, yes?’

‘No, I mean yes, it’s a nice view.  But please stop for a second – what happened to Ramy?  How did he die?  Was it a car accident?”

‘Ramy not died!’ he protested, ‘he away today.  You like view?’

‘But you said Ramy’s dead!’

‘Yes, I Ramy dead!’ he blurted.

‘Oh, you’re Ramy’s dad?  He’s not dead, then!’   I fought the urge to scream.

We both stood there, staring at each other for several seconds – neither of us knowing what to say.  Suddenly, the man became excited and began smiling, again.

‘You happy, now?  You like view, yes?  I tell Ramy you happy, okay?’

‘No.  Please tell your son I am not happy.’  I then escorted him to the door – shook his hand and thanked him. 

I closed the door and stood there wondering, what the heck just happened?  I glanced at my watch – it was Noon and I still hadn’t done anything!  I went to the computer and checked for messages.  I got a message from my friend in Oshawa, who suggested I join the Vintage Oshawa group on Facebook.  I went to that page and started reading some of the posts and started viewing the many photos and posts of familiar landmarks.  I even recognized some of the peoples’ names – and started leaving them messages.  Some of them were guys I hadn’t even seen since high school.  Suddenly, I had to decide:  continue reading stuff on the computer or walk to the mall to get my car rental.  I quickly put on my coat, scarf, toque, and gloves and headed out the door.  The temperature was still in the sub-zero range – and I now wished that I had a packed my balaclava!

But the frigid temperature was a nice change from the mild, Vancouver winter I’d left behind, and it was nice to be able to wear my winter clothes, for a change!  But that sentiment lasted for about two seconds, as my kahunas froze instantly, and I found myself walking up York Street on my tiptoes.  This time I got smart and took a detour through Union Station.  Many of the nearby buildings and malls are connected to the train and subway stations, by a series of tunnels and walkways and it was nice to feel warm and cuddly.

Soon, I was standing at the Budget car rental desk.  I was almost afraid to ask…

‘Yes, I have a reservation for a small car,’ I said boldly.   I was ‘loaded for bear’ and wasn’t going to get pushed around.  I stood there stoically and waited for the rental agent’s answer. 

‘Yes, sir.  Your name please?’

‘Danny St. Andrews,’ I replied.

‘One moment, Mr. Andrew,  Let me check that for you.’

‘Actually, it’s St. Andrews!’, I politely corrected him.

‘Yes, okay.  Denny St. Andrew, right?

‘No, Danny as in Daniel,’ I calmly corrected him.

‘Do you put an ‘S’ in Andrews?

‘Yes, but only by habit.’ 

‘Oh dear, you’ve reserved a compact vehicle.  Would you be interested in upgrading to a Sports Utility Vehicle (SUV), for an additional $10?  They’re calling for snow this week and you’ll want to have four-wheel drive.’

‘Is that ten dollars extra, per day?’

‘Yes, Mr. Andrews.’

‘No, I’ll just stick with the compact.  If it snows, I won’t be driving anywhere,’ I lied (without feeling guilty).

After trying several other tactics to get me to upgrade to a more expensive vehicle, he called to their garage and started speaking to someone about what vehicles they had available.

‘Sir, we don’t have a compact vehicle, so we are going to give you an SUV for the same price.’

‘Awesome!  Thank you!’  Again, I lied.  I have been renting vehicles for many years and I know several universal rules on vehicle rentals, namely:

  1. Never rent from an airport location. There is a hidden ‘airport’ convenience fee that all the rental companies charge.  Also, most locations will let you drop off the vehicle at the airport for no additional fee – but you have to negotiate for this option.
  2. Never let them make you pay for upgrading a vehicle. They probably don’t have the type of vehicle you’ve reserved in their inventory – so don’t let them off the hook by agreeing to pay for an upgrade.
  3. Don’t pay for Sirius or WiFi – they charge $10 minimum per day. The vehicle you get will probably already have these – so why pay extra? 
  4. Don’t pay for roadside assistance. That too is a $10 per day charge.

I stuck to my position and didn’t waiver.  I ended up with a Jeep SUV – and it was loaded with options, including a heated seat and steering wheel!  And it had Sirius Radio and WiFi, too!  I could already feel my pair of kahunas growing back!  But I wasn’t through negotiating, yet.  Originally, I was only going to rent the vehicle for a couple of days – to drive to Oshawa to visit my parents and then on another day, drive to Angus, Ontario to visit my Aunt Fern.  But I was getting such a great deal – I decided to extend the rental for a full week – at the same price!  The agent agreed, and I drove back to the condo a happy boy; and proud of my negotiating prowess!

The drive back to the condo building took less than five minutes and pulled up to the underground parking door, which was closed.  I started pointing the remote at the door, but nothing happened!  I got out of the vehicle and started walking around the area – looking for a box or something to aim the remote at but there wasn’t anything visible.

Suddenly, the door opened and a car emerged from the underground.  I frantically began waving my arms in distress and hoped that the young lady driving, would stop.

‘Sorry, but I can’t get this remote to work.  Is there someplace I should be aiming at?’

But I didn’t hear the words coming from her mouth because she was the prettiest girl I’d seen in several days.  She had dark eyes – which reminded me of my gal pal Harinder; she was well-dressed and her smile almost invited me to flirt.  Geeze, maybe I should ask her what floor she lives on?

She started to explain how to work the remote – in a tone similar to the one you’d use when teaching a child something new.  I cut her off in mid-sentence by shouting ‘thanks!’, while jumping back into my vehicle.  ‘Why is it, that some people from a younger generation, feel it’s necessary to talk to seniors as though we’re senile or hard of hearing?’ I mumbled to myself, as I expertly parked the SUV in the tiniest of parking spaces.  

When I got back to my condo, I decided to make a few calls to schedule visits for the next few days, while I had the vehicle.  It was mid-afternoon, and it would be getting dark soon, so I decided to start writing a blog about this trip.  However, when I tried to log on to my website – I couldn’t perform any of the edit functions.  And although I could still access my emails and the internet – I wouldn’t be able to write or update this story about my trip! I spent the next three hours screaming and swearing at my notebook. 

I then turned my attention to the ‘wannabe’ television – wishing I could watch one of my favorite programs and wondering how I’ll survive without watching television for three weeks!  Suddenly, I felt alone and lonesome.  I made a few phone calls and decided to call it a day.  Tomorrow, I would be visiting my parents in Oshawa – I wonder if I’ll be able to find their place in the snow?  I called my Aunt Fern in Angus and made a date to see her on Wednesday. 

I also made a lunch date with a childhood friend – but that wouldn’t be until the next week.  I went to sleep thinking about her and wondering what we’ll talk about after not seeing each other in fifty years!

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

I decided to avoid the morning rush hour madness and arrived at the flower shop in Whitby, by mid-morning.  I bought two red roses – one of for each of my parents and then headed to their place in Oshawa.  It was nice getting into a warm vehicle and within a few minutes, I was cruising up the Don Valley Parkway and listening to Howard Stern on Sirius Radio.  The temperature was in the sub-zero range and it was cloudy but I was excited to be going home.

However, I always get anxious when driving down Thorton Road towards my Ma and Dad’s place.  By the way, I’ve always called my mother, ‘Ma’ and it used to really bother my Dad because he thought I was being disrespectful.  He probably thought I was comparing her to ‘Ma Kettle’ of the classic Ma and Pa Kettle movies that I used to enjoy watching.  But from my earliest memory – I’ve always called her that and she knew it was my special term of affection for her.   Here is a video clip of our visit:

Visit with Ma and Dad

I got back in my vehicle and decided to drive to a few of my old haunts in Oshawa and Whitby to take some pictures for this story. 

The first stop was 109 Iroquois in north Oshawa, where I first boarded during my last year in high school.  My parents had moved to Georgetown in the Summer of 1968 but I stayed in Oshawa, to be near my girlfriend, and worked part-time to pay my room and board.  This house used to be the home of her sister Vicky and her husband Jerry.  They had a son named Danny, too!   However, as I pulled my vehicle to the curb to take the picture, one of the neighbors came to their window and appeared to be concerned with a stranger taking pictures.  So I left without taking the picture but it was nice to visit a place I had not seen since 1969.

I then drove by the home on Sutherland Avenue where I grew up.  I have driven by this house every time I’ve returned to Oshawa for the past forty years.  The only thing missing on the street was the Chestnut trees and children.  A few years ago, I visited the last remaining neighbor – Mrs. Mills and she had told me that although there was the same number of kids living on the street now as there was in the fifties and sixties – none of today’s kids played outside!  Their exercise now is limited to playing on their computers.

But I really was shocked at the changes in the downtown area – it no longer resembled the once vibrant center of what used to be my Universe.  But then I drove down Albert Street – past 275 and Fuller’s Store, and over the famous wooden, Albert Street bridge to Bloor Street, where my first wife’s family used to live.  That house is no longer there.

I then headed to Whitby to drop by an old friend’s place for a short visit, and then I headed back to Toronto – to avoid the afternoon rush hour.  But Toronto’s rush hour begins at about 6:30 AM in the morning and lasts all day until about 8:00 PM!  I used to think that Vancouver and Montreal had the worst traffic (and drivers!) but now the award goes to the big smoke (Toronto).

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Good morning, Toronto!

 Even though I didn’t have my dog, Holly, to wake me up at two or three o’clock every morning to let her outside to go potty, I found myself waking up at that time anyway.  Habits and routines are difficult to break but I’ve always preferred being an early riser.  Sometimes, when I travel and find myself unable to sleep, I’ll get dressed and take a drive around the city, while drinking coffee and listening to music.  You’d be surprised at the number of people out at that time of night. 

I probably should have left earlier than I did and I should have also relied on Google Map’s automated directions because, within a minute of getting on the Gardiner Expressway, I was in a bumper-to-bumper traffic jam all the way to Highway 427.  But I was listening to music and enjoying the scenery, so I didn’t mind the delay.

I arrived at Aunt Fern’s place mid-morning and we had a nice visit.  I learn so much of my family’s history from her.  She was married to my Ma’s brother (Uncle Jim), who passed away in the 1990’s.  She never remarried and lives happily with Amanda, her granddaughter (my second cousin).   I left in the early afternoon to avoid the afternoon rush hour but promised to come back to Angus for another visit before I return to Vancouver.

Danny & Aunt Fern

Thursday, January 18, 2018

It was colder than I was used to but I was anxious to do some walking.  My friend Verni, from the Vancouver Venturers, gave me a copy of a 10 KM route of the downtown core that she had used when she had visited Toronto but warned that it was difficult to follow because it was printed several years ago, and much had changed.


I wasn’t anywhere near the start point, so I just used the instructions as a guide.  I used to work and live in Toronto, so I wasn’t worried about getting lost.

My first stop was at Union Station on Front Street.  I stopped to chat with a policeman and was able to get a transit supervisor to take a clip of our brief conversation.  Here is the video clip of our chat:

Danny and Toronto Cop

A few blocks later, I was standing at the Air Canada Centre – home of the Toronto Maple Leafs (hockey) and Toronto Raptors (basketball).  The next video clip shows the awesome bronze statues of famous hockey players.  The tribute to Johnny Bower was so touching, I got a lump in my throat, but that was because I almost swallowed my bubble gum.  Here is the video clip:

Toronto Maple Leaf statues

Walking along Queen Street at University Avenue, I stopped at Osgoode Hall Law School – which moved to York University in the 1960’s.  In 1980, I wrote my LSAT exam (and passed) and hoped to apply there as a mature student.  But I decided to stay with General Motors and the rest is history (no regrets).  

Osgoode Hall Law School

I decided to take a detour from the route that Verni gave me and walked over a couple of blocks to Spadina Avenue.  I used to work for a company (Morgan-Uster Inc.) that has long since moved or gone out-of-business.  Switzer’s and Shopsy’s Deli are both gone, although neither was quite as famous as Swartz’s Deli in Montreal.  Here is a video clip:

Morgan-Uster Bldg.

While walking south on Spadina, I met Eduardo.  He feeds pigeons – lots of pigeons!  My cousin Donna, who works in Toronto, told me that he is well-known but not well-liked by some.  But I like animals – and the people who feed them.  Here are two video clips:

Eduardo the Pigeon Man (Part 1 of 2)

Eduardo the Pigeon Man (Part 2 of 2)

 Next, I walked to the offices of the Canadian Partnership Against Cancer.  I was a member of the Measurement Steering Committee for a few years but our meetings were usually in Montreal – so, this was the first time I’d been at the head office.  Met with some of my friends and made plans to return the following week.  Here is a video clip:

CPAC Head Office visit

I continued my walk for another half hour and then got back to the condo for a hot bath – followed by an afternoon nap.  I was meeting a new friend for dinner that night and I wanted to make a good impression.

Friday, January 19, 2018

Today, I was supposed to drive to Coburg,  to visit my friends since high school – Alice and Peter Hrehoruk, but I woke up with a touch of Montezuma’s Revenge (traveler’s diarrhea).  Before leaving Vancouver the week before, I had heard that a lot of it had been going around but it hadn’t affected me, until now.  However, it may have had something to do with the two bottles of wine that we drank the night before and the fact, that I seldom drink alcohol because it burns my throat.

So I called Alice and we rescheduled our visit to next week.  Alice mentioned that she had had the same stomach issue earlier that week.

I spent the rest of the day in bed – except for a quick visit to the pharmacy across the street – for some Kaopectate (Bismuth subsalicylate).  While in bed, I was reading my emails on my laptop and got a suggestion from my friend in Oshawa to join the Vintage Oshawa facebook page.  I couldn’t believe how excited I was getting from viewing the old photographs that people had posted!  The pictures brought back memories I had not thought about in decades.  It was because of Vintage Oshawa, that I decided to visit both my public and high schools.  My friend Beth sent me the names of the school principals for Dr. SJ Phillips School and O’Neill Collegiate & Vocational Institute and I sent each of them an email requesting permission to visit their respective schools.  Hopefully, I’ll get permission from both because I was already getting excited!  

Saturday, January 20, 2018

I awoke, had breakfast, showered, shaved and was soon driving to visit my Grandma Puffer in Ingoldsby, Ontario.  It would take a few hours to get there but I listened to music and enjoyed the drive.  I arrived in Minden before 9:30 AM and drove to the florist shop.  I get the same lump in my throat when I think about my Grandma – she and my Ma were both heroes of my heart.  Here is a video clip:

Minden Flower Shop

I drove down the road towards Haliburton – passed a few interesting sights along the way to the cemetery in Ingoldsby, including Puffer Road, named after my Ma’s family.  Here is a couple of video clips:

Visit with Grandma & Grandpa Puffer

Visit with Grandparents and Uncle Ron & Aunt Kay


To be continued…




Today’s tune from Danny’s library (purchased):  


Rambo and His Kids

Although we had never met – they were perfect strangers, it hurt to see them there in their temporary shelter.  They weren’t much older than teenagers, and yet, there they were all bundled up under an assortment of mix and match blankets and towels – sleeping on the sidewalk.  Laying beside the young couple on the sidewalk, was a large dog.  The dog was all covered up too, with just his head showing.

All three of them were asleep, as I stood and stared at them.  They had a cup and a handwritten sign asking for a donation and another cup beside the dog with kibbles, and a small bowl of water.  I reached into my pocket but didn’t have any cash on me – just credit cards.  I felt guilty as I walked away – heck, these were just children, I thought.

I had come to the city to attend the Crazy8’s Film Info Session at the RIO Theatre on Broadway Avenue, just a few doors down from where the kids and their dog were sleeping.  I checked the time – it was at 11:30 AM – and the event was supposed to end at 4:00 PM, so I doubted that I would ever see them again.  Their reason for being on the street is probably similar to many of the homeless, but I can’t imagine how their current living condition could be better, than what they were trying to escape.   I wanted to stay and wait until they awoke and at least say hello and be a friendly face.  I also wanted to meet their dog.

But the information session was crucial, and I needed to get a good seat, so I rushed into the RIO with my buddy Robert Mahe, with whom I recently started a film production company.  We met as actors on set in 2008, and have been great friends ever since.  We both wanted to produce films and will be using one of my published stories from my website as our first film project.

One hour later…

Although I was really enjoying the session, my mind kept wandering to those kids and their dog, laying on the pavement in the doorway of some building, on a cold and damp October afternoon.  I got up and quickly walked outside the to see if they were still there.  And they were!  So I approached them and said hello.  They looked up at me and smiled!

The dog appeared to be their spokesman because he suddenly gave me an evil-looking stare and then started to bark at me!  I cautiously stepped back to reassure the dog, but that just seemed to make him angrier!

I asked if I could pet their dog, but now the dog was standing and on full alert!  His stare became even scarier and his barking continued – non-stop!

I knew that a barking dog doesn’t mean that it’s vicious – or that it doesn’t like you (unless it’s my dog, Holly).  Barking is their way of communicating.  But it wasn’t his bark that gave me a bit of a chill.  It was his eyes – I’ve never seen eyes like that before in my life!  This was definitely, the scariest-looking dog I’ve ever seen.

“I’m sorry that I upset your dog,” I quickly uttered.

The young man politely explained that the barking indicated that the dog wanted me to pet him!  And although that sounded somewhat counter-intuitive, their love for that dog was apparent, and it was all the reassurance I needed.

“May I take a video clip of your dog?” I asked.

“Sure!” they cheerfully replied.

I asked them for their dog’s name, and then I softly clapped my hands and said: “Come here, Rambo!”

Here’s a video clip of what followed:

Click to view – Rambo and his two kids

But Danny, you took me away from my hectic life to read about two homeless kids and their dog?  Your stories used to be almost interesting, but now they’re redundant.

Relax,  Spanky. And stop picking your nose!

Anyway, I posted this because I told the kids I would post the clip on my Facebook page and gave the boy my card.  But it wasn’t until I got home a few hours later that I remembered that my Facebook page isn’t under my full name; I changed it several months ago.  The library on Georgia Street is probably where they access computers to view their social media pages, and it bothered me that they might be disappointed when they can’t find my FB page.  But my business card also has this website address, so that’s why I’ve written about them and their dog, Rambo – in the faint hope, that they’ll visit my website or email me.  I went to a nearby ATM to get some cash and then returned and gave them $20 and wished them well and then walked away.  The three of them were huddled together in the blanket, and that’s how I’ll always remember them.

It’s heart-breaking to see kids that young on the street and homeless.  And yet, the Little Danny in me admired the fact, that these kids would rather be homeless than be apart.  When I was their age, I too made a sacrifice to leave home to be with the one I loved and worked my way through the last year of high school just so I could be with her.  There were many days I went to bed hungry, but it was worth it.  But here’s the difference: when my girlfriend’s father forbade her from seeing me after we got engaged, she obeyed him, and I never saw her again.  I didn’t know it at the time, but her father did me a favor – because his daughter didn’t love me enough to run away with me.  I heard that she married a rich guy, which now makes sense.

So in closing, I hope that the kids get to read this and see the video.  I also wanted the kids to know that I would have made the same sacrifice for love as they have and that they and their dog will always be my heroes!

And now the sky is crying!  Bye, Rambo!


Little Danny

Today’s tune from Danny’s music library (purchased):  Positively 4th Street ~ Bob Dylan


Lyrics:   Positively 4th Street

You’ve got a lotta nerve to say you are my friend
When I was down you just stood there grinning.
You got a lotta nerve to say you’ve got a helping hand to lend
You just want to be on the side that’s winning.
You say I let you down you know it’s not like that
If you’re so hurt why then don’t you show it.
You say you’ve lost your faith but that’s not where it’s at
You had no faith to lose and you know it.
I know the reason that you talk behind my back
I used to be among the crowd you’re in with.
Do you take me for such a fool to think I’d make contact
With the one who tries to hide what he don’t know, to begin with.
You see me on the street you always act surprised
You say, “How are you?” “Good luck” but you don’t mean it.
When you know as well as me you’d rather see me paralyzed
Why don’t you just come out once and scream it.
No, I do not feel that good when I see the heartbreaks you embrace
If I was a master thief perhaps I’d rob them.
And I know you’re dissatisfied with your position and your place
Don’t you understand it’s not my problem.
I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes
And just for that one moment, I could be you.
Yes, I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes
You’d know what a drag it is to see you.
Songwriters: Bob Dylan
Positively 4th Street lyrics © Bob Dylan Music Co.

Little Danny (1952)

Walking and Living on the EDGE


On April 11, 2017, at 2:00 PM, I walked on the edge of the CN Tower EDGE WALK in Toronto, Ontario.  It was almost the scariest thing I’ve ever done in my life!   Almost! 

I had traveled to Toronto to attend the Canadian Partnership Against Cancer – Innovative Approaches to Optimal Cancer Care in Canada conference (April 7 & 8th) at the Harbour Castle Hotel (as a patient advocate) and had extended my trip a few days to do this, as it was the second last item on my Bucket List of things to do.  

The adventure took ninety minutes – with thirty minutes actually walking around the outside of the tower and doing various poses for the camera.  There were two staff members accompanying us at all times – one giving instructions and the other taking pictures and a video – which were included in the price of the package.  It was definitely, one of the most exciting things that I have ever done in my life.

UPDATE  June 1, 2017:  Here is a link to the four video clips of my walk.


“Living with Cancer isn’t a death sentence – but giving up on Living is.  Never stop chasing your Dreams and you’ll live Forever!” ~ Danny 




Danny goes to Camp!

Danny will walk on the edge of the CN Tower in April


“In the dark of the broad daylight, I promise I’ll be there” ~ For Whom the Bell Tolls ~ BeeGees

It started the way all great trips start – with a simple plan.  Get to the CN Tower in Toronto – home of the Blue Jays – and do the Edge Walk outside the top – suspended by a leash.  It’s the kind of excitement that’s been missing in my life and I’ve convinced myself that it will restore the flame that once burned passionately in my soul.  But I couldn’t get passed the main obstacle to fulfilling this bucket list item – I’d already said all of my goodbyes to my hometown in Ontario, last Spring (see  My Last Visit ).

And it’s hard to justify the cost for hotel and airfare just to satisfy a silly need or whim, right?  Of course, it is Danny.  But all of that changed when my phone rang.

I looked at the call display and didn’t recognize the number, so I just disregarded it as I do with all unknown callers (telemarketers, scams etc.).  But this one left a message.  And the moment I heard it, I got excited – really, really excited!

It was the Canadian Partnership Against Cancer calling to confirm my attendance at the upcoming cancer conference in Toronto in April.  I had not understood that I had been invited to attend but the phone message was a request to discuss my flight and travel arrangements and meeting schedules etc.  And as excited as I am about anything related to cancer – I was selfishly happy to know that I might get to fulfill one of my last bucket list items, after all!

But then, I remembered what my buddy Billy used to say – “be careful what you ask for – ’cause you might get it!”  Scared, Danny?  Yup!  Still going to do the walk, Danny?  Yup!

And then today, as I sat watching my Blue Jays first preseason game on television, I decided to buy a ticket to their home opener on April 11th.  I was going to get the best seat I could get – who knows if I will ever be back to see another game.  I share the same philosophy on concert tickets – why watch the artist from the nose bleed section if you can afford to sit in better seats?  I mean, if I don’t smoke, and don’t drink, then surely attending a few concerts or sporting events in nice seats is not extravagant.  Well, it’s not to me – money has never been important to me.  It’s why I dislike being around people who appear obsessed with it.

And isn’t it great that I can order my ticket online and choose my seat?  And when you only are buying one ticket – you will always get better seats.  But then my heart stopped beating – the home opener is already sold out!  WTF? (Why The Face?).  Of course!  The whole city of Toronto will probably be closed for the day – to celebrate the home opener.  And right they should!

I quickly moved my cursed cursor down to the next game April 12th and quickly grabbed a lone seat, a few rows above the Dugout on the first base line!  And including my donation to the Blue Jays children’s fund, it only cost 80 bucks, all total!

In high school, we used to have a saying for being outrageously happy.  It was “YIPPEE SHIT HEMORAGE!”

And although I’m not really going to camp, it sure feels like shouting “YIPPEE SHIT HEMORAGE!”

And it’s what you’ll hear me shouting when I get the CN Tower Excellent Adventure, captured on my cell phone camera – and posted to this page in early April.



UPDATE 4/4/17:  I will be in Toronto for one week and will be visiting the following:

  • Parents grave
  • Cousin Donna & her family
  • Aunt Fern
  • Peter & Alice
  • Western Region Alumni (offsite)
  • The old ‘hood’ in Oshawa

– Danny